Yesterday John bonked his head. No big deal, just a little bonk, but there was a bit of a sting and so he came to me and said, "Bonked my head, kiss it?" And with my magical mommy powers, I told him I was sorry he was hurt and kissed it and he was able to continue playing. I was thinking about it a little, though. John, like every little kid who ever bonked his head in front of his mom, needed to have his hurt recognized before he was able to move on and continue playing. If I weren't there, he would surely be able to continue playing, and even though I wasn't the one who caused the hurt, it obviously helped him to have someone affirm his feelings.
It's interesting that we don't grow out of this. I think this is a fundamental need we have as human beings. We may grow out of needing kisses when we bonk our heads (maybe, sometimes I still need a little kiss or two), but we still need to have our hurts recognized sometimes to feel affirmed so that we can move on.
Dan and I had a little misunderstanding (very silly) and it's all better now, but it's hard for us to get over those misunderstanding until we recognize the hurts we may have accidentally caused. To affirm each other by saying, "I'm sorry" and then kissing it better. It's just interesting to me that this need for affirmation we feel is something we grow up with, not that we learn later in life.